Goodbyes are never easy

The last two weeks I have been in another world.  Caiden was here for the Summer and was getting ready to leave.  We spent some time playing games, watching movies and just hanging out.  I had a major paper due (and a test every week) while he was here, but luckily HR was here to take him out.  He also helped me tremendously with Trey's 3rd birthday party at school.  The theme was tractors, the boys absolutely love tractors...and we made smocks and goody bags for his class.

We dropped of Caiden at the airport last Saturday.  We spent the day Thursday and then again on Friday playing outside in the water and on a giant waterslide.  It was a blast and the boys really enjoyed their last few days with big brother.  I feel like it went by too fast, like I had just picked him up and I was already having to drop him back off.  One more year!  One more year of grad school and one more year without my baby.  I always miss him when he leaves, but I know he's in good hands.  So proud of him for being such a great big brother.  His brothers definitely look up to him:

School has kept me pretty busy and the kids continued to pass a bug around for a few weeks, but I have still found some time to run 2-3 times a week, which is much less than I'd like, but better than nothing.  Yesterday I ran 40 minutes.  Generally I don't like treadmill running, but I ran 2 on the treadmill in the middle of my run to cool off and break up the run (It was 4:45pm when I set out on my run and 101 out).  I'm still not convinced I like treadmills or would use one very often, but it was nice to get out of the heat/humidity.  It was also much easier to keep up my goal pace.  

This was just a little update to let you know I'm still here!  

Challenge

I'd love to write about running and all the consistent running and progress I've been making.  I'd love to write about how I've acclimated to the outdoors and have been doing some indoor "speed" workouts at the university gym.  I would be lying.

I ran 3 short runs last week and once this week.  The truth is, as much as I want to run more, life's little challenges have gotten in the way.  You may call them excuses, but there are some things I just cannot get around.  Last week HR was gone for 7 days and 8 nights.  He was working in a rural cellular "dead zone".  Our contact was limited to a few strange texts that came at random times of day.  When he is gone I am a single mom.  He hates when I say that, but I am.  We have no friends (other than the ones I've made that are actually part of my program) or family around to help me.  Seventy percent of the time I am a single mom raising 2.5 kiddos (Caiden has been splitting his time visiting us and his cousins and grandma).  I have to get my runs in sometime after I drop off the boys at daycare at 8:00am (but not until my 8:30am class is over at 10:30am) and before I pick them up at 4:15pm.  Not to mention that I am currently taking summer courses.  I pretty much have a 4.5 hour window on a given day to do whatever it is I need/want to do which includes things like: working out, showering, cleaning house, laundry, reading, homework assignments, grocery shopping, cooking.....

Last week Trey scratched his cornea.  I spent a day at the doctor for a few hours since we were walking-in.  Thursday there was no daycare due to the 4th of July holiday.  I ran Tuesday and Friday and intended on a Sunday long run since HR would be back by then.  I opted instead for a family walk/run.  We walked about a mile, and Trey ran just over 400m with me.

Trey ran and ran, and even stopped to smell the flowers =)

This week Trey woke up one night throwing up.  I had to get up and get him bathed, the bed itself cleaned and the sheets, pillow and comforter had to be rinsed and thrown in the wash.  In the midst of it all Ryan woke up. I had to put them both to sleep.  Cut to...about an hour later I finally drifted back to sleep when HR's phone was going off.  The yard was calling and wanting him to come in in an hour.  The yard is about 35 min away, so we scrambled to make sure he had everything and I saw him off.  I had restless sleep the rest of the night.

The next evening Trey had a nose bleed and then it was Ryan's turn to throw up.  Womp Womp.  Repeat clean up.

Today, I got a little creative and did some stairs in the library and some stride outs too.  It's Thursday, the library was dead.  My back ached from sitting for hours, not to mention it was freezing in there.  Why not?

***This was written last week and I completely forgot to submit it ***
FYI: This week was no better for running as I had a research paper to do and the stomach but made another round, to include myself and Caiden this time.  Running has take a bit of a back seat, but I've not forgotten it.  Ran 2.5 easy miles this morning.

South Texas Training

I've been training myself to start training.  Sounds a little stupid, I know but what I mean is that I have been trying to acclimate to the heat and humidity.  Summer arrived while I was taking about a month off to nurse my sprained ankle.  Humidity has been getting close to 90% pretty much at any time of day. I think I'm getting used to running in South Texas conditions.  I am definitely hydrating more and have considered getting a camelbak.

What I mean is for now, I'm just been putting in "time" on the road.  I haven't worried much about how many miles or how fast I am going.  The couple of times I took my Soleus gps watch out I was sorely disappointed.  Mentailly, it's a difficult thing to run now.  I was fairly competitive back in my day and seeing the numbers now makes me cringe a little.  So I set my goals as 30 min, 45 min, etc...except on Saturdays when I typically go to back home and run with members of a running club.

I estimate that I ran about 25 miles last week (cautiously).  On Saturday I got up at 4:30 to run with my girls back home.  It was 78 degrees but actually felt it.  Generally I am used to the heat index being 10-15 degrees higher.  It was a welcome change, too bad I can't run at that hour all the time.  Anyway, our goal was to run 6, but we ended up overshooting a little and ran 6.12.  These are the times I kind of wish I used my Soleus more; I would have completed the 10k.

Incorporating any speed work will come in the next few weeks.  I really just wanted a little base mileage to get my body going and have a starting point.  I did manage a mini speed workout in the form of a tempo run last week and hit pretty close to what I'd like my goal pace to be for the half in October.  My sister and I are collaborating on my workouts.  Mostly she tells me what to do and I try not to have to modify it too much, lol.  Honestly, usually what she tells me is what I had in mind anyway, but it's easier for me to be motivated when I have to be accountable to someone else.

Sunday was my day off and today ended up being an unexpected day off because I had to take Trey to the doctor (he scratched his cornea).  We didn't have an appointment so we spent a couple of hours at the doctor and then I had class.  Next week I start a morning class, so my availability to workout will be the window between 10am and 3pm.  Not looking forward to that...will probably move most of my runs indoors unless HR is home.

My Motivation

I have decided to run more.  For years I've run a couple of times a week, most weeks, ok, a lot of weeks.  Of course there have also been times when I didn't run for weeks or months for personal or health reasons.  I had a lower lumbar spinal fusion, pneumonia, ankle sprains, three children-one of which was high risk and resulted in an emergency c-section, etc... I've been a military wife/mom, I've been a single mom, and now I'm a married civilian mom raising my children mostly alone because my husband's job keeps him away about 75% of the time.

Since my competitive years (I started when I was 9 and ran in high school and collegiately), running is more of a social event for me than anything else.  I doubt I will ever be as fast as I once was.  It's not that it's impossible, but it's just not a priority.  I enjoy running with others and find it difficult to get out the door and run alone.  Last year I found a running group where I lived and made fast friends with a few members who lived just miles from me.  I ran alone a few days a week, as well as with my new friends once or twice a week.  I've since moved for grad school, but whenever I go home we do our best to meet up and run on Saturday mornings.

Generally, I lack motivation. I think it may be the procrastinator in me....but I want to run more.  Lack of motivation stems from: the hellish South Texas heat and humidity (heat index consistently in the triple digits), maintaining the house, keeping up with three boys-two of them under the age of 3, and my courseload.  I took 15 hours last semester (my first semester), 9 this Summer and will be taking 16 in the Fall.  I actually just got a phone call informing me that my request for an overload was granted.  A lot of times I also just have no one to watch the boys-we moved from away home for me to attend grad school, plus the great friends I've made are in my program and have the same class schedule as I do.

Lately though, I have been motivated.  I read several blogs about fitness, running and nutrition which makes me daydream about accomplishing my own, similar goals.  I've been reading them for months, however, and it hasn't really lit much of a fire in me.  My true motivation is coming from people who are just beginning (or re-beginning) their fitness journeys.  Maybe it's less intimidating, or because I know their struggles.  Those who are well into their journey make it seem so easy and effortless.  I guess I feel like I have training partners in the newbies because we are dealing with the same demons and their small words of encouragement through a text or social media means they're watching me too.
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Two weeks ago I decided to amp up the motivation and make an actual goal for myself.  I've run more races in my career than I could even begin to count but never anything over a 10k.  My goal is to complete the Hill Country Half in October.  Excerpt from their race description on active.com:
 "Lookin' for that new 1/2 marathon challenge in your life and a race worthy enough to call Texas home? Wrestle up your favorite runnin' shoes cuz the elements that make Texas great from the wide open spaces to the native landscape covered hills await you along a very scenic & smooth roads in and around the JW Marriott.  When you're done, enjoy an after party full of everything Texan and the kind of relaxation only a world class resort can provide. Great group room rates available. We run Texas tough; no challenge too steep and no reward too luxurious. Are YOU ready for the challenge?"
Definitely a challenging first 1/2 marathon to pick, but hey if you're gonna go for it, go big!  Here's hoping for smooth training....

Weekend family time

Spent the weekend here!

This weekend we went "home" to visit both sides of the family.  HR's parents hadn't seen the boys in several weeks and my older sister was driving down to meet Sophia.  We stayed at my in-laws.  The pic above is part of their backyard.  Isn't it lovely?  I took dozens of pictures, but this was one of my favorites.  The boys played in the water and roamed around the "ranch".  I imagine they feel pretty adventurous back there.  There is lots to do and find there.

We took a little break from the outdoors and went to see Monster's University.  This was Trey's first movie theater experience.  He did really well and we all enjoyed the movie.  Caiden's bff and cousin Katelyn joined us as well.  It's always cute to see how protective he is of her (and his brothers), walking her to the bathroom and up to her door when we dropped her off.

Excited for movie time.

On Sunday my mom's boyfriend bbq-ed for us.  The boys, my sister and I had a blast playing with Sophia.  The boys couldn't get enough of her, always trying to hold her and kiss her.  

Have I mentioned the hubs had a chance to come down?  He was supposed to be off Wednesday, Thursday and Friday but wasn't able to come home afterall.  On Friday night they finally made it in from Buffalo, TX and he decided to drive down.  He arrived at 3am and had to be back in Kingsville by midnight to be ready to be called out.  So we spent the day playing with the boys and he left after dinner, around bedtime.  Such a treat for them (and me)!!!

Now it's back to reality....class tonight!

Back at it

So I obviously took a blogging hyatus, again.  It happened near the end of last year too.  I guess I just need a break from life by the end of the school year.  I focused on getting my thesis proposal done and turned in, potty training Trey and Caiden coming home for the Summer.  Good news I got all As and also, Caiden made it home in one piece....so proud of him for flying alone. He made it here a full week before he decided we were boring and asked to go visit his grandparents and cousins, lol.

Now I'm back at it.  I am taking 3 classes this Summer and have already signed up for the Fall 2013 semester-16 hours, eek!  I had to apply/request permission to take an overload.  Luckily, one of my "classes" is my practicum which means no assignments or tests (although I'd argue that all the lesson plans ARE assignments as they take a lot of creativity, time and energy) and another just changed from a 3 hour course to 4.

I had to stop running for a few weeks because I sprained my ankle pretty badly playing basketball with my nephews and niece.  I still got some moves and by the way, my team won!  So I have been slowly building back up, going from running only twice a week, to finally running all week this week.  It's been a grueling comeback as the temperatures are now soaring in the 80-90s and humidity in the mid- to high 70s...makes for "real feel" temps in the 90s and 100s.  It is exhausting, but I have been reading some great articles on acclimating to the heat.  I intend on staying exclusively outside for another week or two and then moving speed workouts indoors to benefit from them more (and not kill myself!)

I must say I enjoy running here, despite the almost unbearable temperatures.  There is so much beauty around me.  I love seeing the historical structures, wildlife, livestock, open fields, Texas/country pride...  Here a few images of where my feet have taken me:

Ryan, my poor baby, he burned his hand on my curling wand earlier this week.  I was taking Trey to the restroom one morning just before leaving for daycare when he wandered into my room, plugged it in and then apparently touched it to the top of his hand.  He didn't cry or scream, I had no idea it had happened.  He walked to the truck and climbed into his seat and still I had no idea.  I figured it out when we got to daycare and got this shot of it: 

I'm no expert, but we are guessing it borders between a 2nd and 3rd degree burn.  It now (3 days later) looks like this:

                                                         

That picture was immediately after I uncovered it,that's why it looks a little "wet".  I have done some reading and contacted the doctor by phone (HR just got a new job and we are having some insurance issues) and he assured me the color and secretions were typical of a burn.  A moist environment is needed for it to properly heal and the skin secretes plasma to help protect the raw skin.  We are keeping it covered most of the day, especially at daycare and letting it breathe in the evenings.  

This weekend I get to go home and visit family, my sisters, mom and I will all be together to have a little welcome party for my newborn niece - Sophia Grace.  

Bubba

Tomorrow is Caiden's 9th birthday!  NINE!  I can't believe how fast time has flown.  I still think of him as my little chunky monkey.

I'm so proud of the little man he has become.  He has always known exactly what he wants.  I know it may seem odd to refer to him as a man, but he has always been his age going on 30.  He's strong, intelligent and extremely rational.  He keeps us all grounded.  He has a keen sense for others emotions and feelings, and I've seen him lie to protect us.

I am bummed that I won't be with him on his big day, but I know he is happy.  He told me when he came down for Spring Break that he knew how hard this was for me because I love him so much and he loves me too, but that he was happy to be in California with his dad because his dad loves him too and deserves a chance to get to know him better.  He couldn't be more right.

His big wish every year: to have ALLhis family together in one place.  Maybe someday.....graduation maybe?

I love you son, I hope that you have a special day with your dad!  Happy Birthday!